In this post, I'll basically re-justify the fact why I hate my college and why I am forced to being selfish. Before I move on, I would humbly apologize to those of my college whom I really love and respect. And to those who think they deserve my love and respect, well fella, you gotta earn it!
One of my beloved juniors, who I love as my own brother, asked me this question today-"Dada, won't you be present at the saraswati puja celebrations of our college?" And quite contrary to his perception of me I said an over emphasized(just typed in caps) and a straight-forward "NO." His astonishment was obvious and I quite expected the "Why?" I got in return. But the answer to the why, was too long to type on a chat forum, or rather too long to make a chat boring. So I summarized it in a sentence I love the most-"I hate my college."
Now what am I in college? I mean I am who I am, but what do I really do to put up forward the image of my college's ambassador? I participate whole-heartedly. I am an active member of two clubs. So my dear brother and the rest of thee first year guys and girls often see me everywhere. They must think that I am a devoted patriot of my college!
Right? WRONG! I'll justify why I do what I do. There are a few things you can do living alone in a hostel. One of those things are to sit with text-books and mug up everything from the first line in the first page to the last line of the last page. Many people do it. I don't, rather I cannot. And to be honest I will not. If my education is bound within pages of textbooks and I am judged on how well I have mugged up my texts, I better be uneducated than going through such education. So this possibility is eliminated for me.
The next type is do nothing. They are the local heroes, generally boast a lot about their masculinity and their encyclopedic knowledge of pornography and also, their varied and numerous experiences at tasting the different brands of liquor, cigarettes, drugs and marijuana. They criticize, they don't a thing other than sleeping their days off, they don't even manage to complete the first sentence of the first page of their textbooks. I am sorry to say that they are most in numbers. I can be social about everything but not a boastful addict.
Now there are the other hybrid types and the perfect types too. I hate both the others, but I'll limit myself to mentioning the two extremities. Now look, I have to live alone with nothing that I love can I do. So if a club's activity helps me improve my speaking skills, I join in. If a quiz competition helps me improve my GK, I participate. If a debate helps me speak better in public, I debate. If singing make me happy, I sing during cultural events. The truth is I have a selfish reason behind every of my deeds and activities which is quite opaque to most of my college mates, seniors and juniors. So basically an honest confession before them will be synonymous to hypocrisy on my part.
Sorry guys, I cannot help being more honest, because this is the most I can be. I am selfish, I am ruthless, I am heartless and I hate my college. This is to all who have personally taken care to make a funny showpiece out of me or to make my life miserable-Do what you want, I don't care, because I don't need to.
Lastly, I will end with a message to those I love and respect because I know they know that I love them. I am sorry guys, but this is not fury that you see. This is just despise and hatred. Don't belittle my love for you after reading these words, because I'll love you and only you of everybody in college. You are the guys I live with. Thank you for being there for me.
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